Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Part 2

I sent a text to my mom & dad just warning them that I was going to the hospital to see if my water had broke & not to leave yet because it could be a false alarm. They both live around 12 hours away & can't afford two trips out here. The lady at the desk gave me a bracelet & sent me to the room next door where I met another woman at a desk (much nicer) & she had me fill out a clip board. After that was finished, we were then sent to a room similar to a doctor's office visit where I changed into a gown & laid on the table. For the next 20 minutes I spent my time calling my mom, dad, and sisters over and over again. The first to answer was my little sister Annie her response was (are you kidding, I have to work tomorrow, ugghhhhhh) & then she woke up my older sister. It took my dad almost an hour to get a hold of, his phone was surprisingly off & thankfully my little brother happened to be hanging out a  park at 3 in the morning & answered & rushed home to get my dad to wake up. Then my best friend Katie (God mommy) text me & asked if she could ride with my dad from Kansas to come too, so I was super excited she was going to be able to make it. The nurses came in & started asking me what was going on & asking for all my information. She told me there was two tests they could do to determine if my water had broke, she mentioned one was even expensive so she was hoping the other test would prove it had broke. She told me to lay back and cough as hard as I could. So I did, and sure enough I felt like all the sudden I peed myself. I can't explain to you how identical it felt like to peeing. Once it came out, it started coming out every time I moved or every 2 minutes for the next hour and lasting at least 8 seconds every time. I kept telling the nurse "are you sure i'm not peeing, will you just check".   She then asked me if I had a birth plan & I told her it was in the car, she looked shocked that we hadn't brought the bags in, but we didn't know it was for real. Adam went & got the bags & handed her the birth plan, I don't have a copy saved of my birth plan but here were some of the main points I had on it....

Birth Plan
-No pain medication of any kind
-No epidural
-Adam cut the cord
-Baby be placed on my chest right after birth
-Breastfed as soon as he is born
-Take a bath, walk around, bounce on a ball, nipple stimulation to induce labor
- Eat & drink what I want
- Minimal fetal monitoring
- Rip instead of episiotomy
-No pitocin for the delivery of placenta
- Wait till the cord stops pulsating to be cut

Let me just say, its nice to go in having a plan so you feel a little more prepared for the situation. But in my case, nothing prepared me for the labor I had. You have to have an open mind, because honestly your going to end up doing whatever the doctors say is necessary to keep you and the baby healthy. After my water had clearly broke, I was given a huge pair of granny panties & a large menstrual pad.  Then came the moment I had mentally been preparing myself for since day one, the IV. Yes, I realize I should have been mentally preparing for delivery of a baby, but I have a SERIOUS phobia of IVs, even though I've never had one, I've been exposed to them & towards the end of labor I was sitting on my hands trying not to look at my veins & crying myself to sleep at the thought of having to have one, I begged my doctor not to have one but she told me they legally could not help me with my labor if I didn't accept an IV, even if I signed a release form. Adam held my hand & my head away from my left arm so I didn't see anything, It didn't hurt like I thought it was going to hurt just a small prick, but once it was in I was uncontrollably crying because I wanted it taken out so bad, I hated the feeling it was giving my arm, I felt like my left arm was immobile and they put it in such a weird spot on my wrist that it kept pinching me. I honestly think I would have been able to handle labor better if I wouldn't have been so concerned with the IV the whole time. The nurses were really patient & understanding though & Adam explained them that it was a huge deal to me. I asked her to cover it up so I didn't have to look at it, She ended up cutting up a baby hat and turning it into a mini sleeve & taped it over my IV.

After what I thought was the worst part was over, we then walked to my delivery room. It was HUGE, & very comforting feeling. I sat down in the bed & was introduced to the nurse. The nurse was really cool she was from a different state and she was all about natural births. She gave me some advice on what I could do to ease pain & so on. I started off by walking around the room, still trying to get a hold of my mom, & just taking it all in. We set up our scentsy in the corner (wax candle) & put the apple smell in it. That was probably the best idea we had, it made the room not smell like a hospital & felt like we were at home. The nurse came in & told us I could be off the fetal monitor for 45 minutes, but then I would have to be on it for 30 minutes, & thats how it had to be until I gave birth. I wasn't really having contractions at that point, at least not ones that felt like they hurt just a little back ache. I finally got a hold of my mom but turns out she was on vacation so she wasn't going to be able to make it till the next day around 5, it was very upsetting but I knew my sister's were on the way & that my dad, Katie, and brother would be there in 10 hours by that point. My mom & I ended up texting all day. The nurse came in and checked me around 7 & told me I was only dilated to 1 still. The monitors had shown that my contractions were coming, but they were VERY irregular. My sister's finally showed up & my contractions started getting painful.

I thought at that point we were good to go, my contractions looked to be like they were coming regularly, my younger sister & I were using the contractions application on my phone to time them, even though the doctor's were timing them as well with the monitor. They weren't extremely painful, but they were similar to lower back menstrual cramps. Walking really helped to take the edge off. I decided to take my gown off & wear my robe & sticky socks w/ a nursing bra. I didn't care if any of it got ruined. I really didn't like being hooked up to the monitor for 30 minutes, I felt so restricted, we had to take them off to use the rest room, you couldn't really move or you would mess up the signal for the contractions or babies heartbeat. As one rolled around 11 hours after my water broke....I was still dilated to a 1. The midwife came in finally & talked with me for the first time, it was funny because she was the midwife we had had our doctor's appointment with the week before & she was the one who told us to go to Scalinis and get the eggplant. I was excited it was her, she was defiantly one of the midwifes that I liked & I was super glad she was delivering my baby. I saw several nurses throughout the day. Once 3 came around, they started talking to me about getting pitocin to induce labor because I wasn't progressing & my contractions had stopped coming regularly & were irregular again. I was so worn out & disappointed by that point. Then the nurse came in & told me she wasn't comfortable taking me off the monitor this time because the babies heartbeat wasn't doing what she needed it to do. She wanted to see it peak to 140, twice, in a matter of 10 minutes for a certain amount of time, which it never ended up doing again, so from 3 on, I was hooked up to the fetal monitor. It was the worst feeling in the world to know I couldn't get up & do things to induce labor on my own anymore.

At that point, the doctor's pretty much said pitocin was my only option. My water had been broken for 13 hours & I was increasing my risk of infection. I couldn't be taken off the monitor, I just had to lay there, I was dilated at a 2, things weren't progressing. I thought on it for another hour & finally told the nurse to come in and administer the the pitocin. I didn't feel anything for about an hour or so. Then out of no where I started getting contractions, they were really painful & just keep getting worse. Adam had me leaned over the bed rubbing my back, I was allowed to bounce on the ball right next to the monitor, we used combs, massage tools, heating pads, I kept vigorously sucking on lollipops & mints because I was starving & it seemed to take my mind off the pain a little. I was grunting & screaming it felt like the worst menstrual cramps you've ever had. They were in my lower back just like when I have my period.  I would run to the bathroom between contractions to go pee because every time I got caught on the toilet with a contraction it was the worst feeling ever. If I didn't have Adam hard core massaging my back I wouldn't have been able to handle the pain. I remember looking at the tv or a picture and just blurting out in my head every word I could think of that the picture had in it (water, blue, bird, grass, dog, vacation) it seemed to help me concentrate. Breathing was probably the hardest, your in so much pain its practically impossible to take deep breathes and control your breathing. 

When 7 rolled around Katie, my dad, and Ethan finally made it from Kansas. I was SO RELIEVED at that point. I was so happy they weren't going to miss it & I had my dad there. The contractions were so bad at that point I couldn't physically handle it anymore. I asked what my options were & she told me I could have nubain.  She said it would take the edge off the pain. After thinking it over for a while, all I could think about was "what if it messes with Matthew's heartbeat and makes me have to have a c-section" I kept asking the nurse if it was going to do that, and how it was going to make me feel, so on. Eventually after talking to my mom and dad about it enough, I took the nubain. It didn't do anything for me, whatever edge they were talking about was still there clear as day & I couldn't take it. I started feeling delusional & so tired I couldn't function. I could barely keep my eyes open and the pain was unbearable. I kept telling Adam "it hurts just as bad before, but now i'm super tired and can't think straight". All the medication did was make me feel loopy and extremely tired. Time seemed to be flying by at first but by this point it was going super slow & every minute was counting. I was so worried about the babies heartbeat, & anxious about the birth & all I could think about was having to have a c-section because I had been pinned to this bed & given all these medications. I was checked again and dilated to a 4, which wasn't much but it was comforting to know that I was actually getting somewhere. 

 Annie was eating a bag of doritos, I begged the nurse to let me have just  one but they refused and said I couldn't have anything because I was going to throw up. So I continued to suck on lollipops. By that point my nurse was named Ashley she was super pretty & young. She was really nice & was going to be there with me until birth. I was just happy to know that I had two woman that I really liked taking care of me. I knew they were annoyed with me though because of all the crying, and debating, I knew they were just trying to help me & I kept apologizing for being annoying. I just had never been in a hospital, with medication, and IVS and on a bed all day. It sucked. 

To be continued....

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